Well here it is… there are Little Schits on sale

I got a bar of chocolate from the Schit Schop and it was quite tasty then I suggested doing more with the Schitt name.  They couldn’t change the double T but I’m very happy that Schit is spreading.

Who knows where this will go?  I’ve been sent one of each Little Schit Gift Pack ha ha.  Look out suckers!!!! You may get one from me.

http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=230682835949#ht_635wt_1138

Greedy Schit Chocolate

greedy by schitschop
greedy, a photo by schitschop on Flickr.

Just something interesting, it’s not everyday you get a chocolate bar named after you.

There are four others that are equally entertaining and I have to wonder what it tastes like? To that end I am going to call them up and get a free sample sent to me (on account of my name) and will come back to let you know if it really is good Schitt or just plain Schit (one “t” …stay with me now).

Jack

Dogs Driving me Crazy?

Ever noticed how dogs in the rear of vehicles look at you when you’re behind the vehicle they’re in?  The following may change your perception of dogs and your beliefs in perception when you get to see it for yourself.

Next time you’re driving along and you see one of man’s (bored) best friends peering out of the rear window just wait until you lock eyes.  As soon as you lock eyes it will turn it’s gaze away and make believe it didn’t see you because maybe it’s embarrassed to be riding in back or similar.  Give it a few seconds of staring, no more, then you have to look away too.  Wait a second longer and look back at it, you’ll see it’ll be staring straight at you again.

Let me know if I’m the only crazy dude who communicates with dogs telepathically on the highway? (tempting to tell it “Your owner is a schitt driver so bite him AFTER I have passed you”)

Jack

Telepathic animal communication

Telepathic inter-animal communication

Hemorrhoids and Wrinkles

You may not know this but people’s vanity has led them to putting pile cream on their wizzened faces. Now before I go any further it must be told I met an ex model 14 years ago who did this “Bum Botox” beauty regime and the results were not worth the close-up. The problem is pile creams thin and shrink…..Hemorrhoids.

Her skin was strange, like filo pastry that got creased up, unfolded and smoothed out again with oil (I think my mother was Asian and she used to filo a lot of shellfish things and veg). A bit of make-up and you wouldn’t really see the veins under the skin and a kiss on the cheek reminiscent of kissing……luke warm samosas. Thankfully she only used it as a night cream so the medicated “fragrance” was normally washed away in the morning. I won’t give the model’s name for Jnr’s sake.

The pile creams of today have changed to be more effective in the fight against the notorious Emma Freuds and, unfortunately medical advances have ensured this wrinkle decreaser is even more damaging to your facial skin than 14 years ago.

Really, just use it for the other end and if you see your mother secretly applying it in the bathroom mirror at least you no longer need to imagine her with Farmer Giles.

Jack

The-Impact-of-Painful-Hemorrhoids-On-World-Events
Smiles all round after one week of treatment

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